Free Roll 4 Shoes Adventure: DISASTER at Princess Pumpernickel’s Magical Birthday Cooking Competition! (version 1)

A mashed potato monster found on the internet

 DISASTER
at Princess Pumpernickel’s
Magical Birthday Cooking Competition

***
Princess Pumpernickel (7 years old) organized her yearly Magical Birthday Cooking Competition and you, for better or for worse, have joined in to this Magical Masterchef competition, where the winner gets incredible riches and the loser will spend a year in the dungeons!

This year a disaster happens when a magical mash potatoes and sausages golem has gone rogue and started to wreak havoc! So far, the princess is still amused, but things might go bad for you if you cannot put an end to this golem … in the most entertaining way possible.

You are some type of Magical Cook with enough expertise, or such an inflated ego, that you would at least think of standing a chance and not end up in the dungeons.

***

Base System: Roll for Shoes (https://rollforshoes.com/)
Extra’s: Choose a background that informs how easy or difficult your actions might be. You can choose or roll d66 (2d6: first die is first digit, second die is second digit) on the list or invent your own (GM fiat). There can be no two of the same. The person who celebrated their birthday most recently gets to pick or roll first.

11. Mash-o-mancer: You start with a sack of magical potatoes. How are they magical? The GM might tell you, or ask you, depending on how he feels.


12. Pastamancer: You start with Grandma’s magical cookbook. There’s no recipes in there, but grandma’s ghost will yell at you when you do things wrong and tell you to measure with your soul.


13. Sushi Shaman: You start with an aquarium on wheels, in which a fresh mermaid is captured. Does she help, or is she an ingredient?


14. Garlic Warlock: You start with a wreath of mystical garlic.


15. Cheezard: You start with a giant wheel of Elemental Emmental cheese.

16. Soup Witch: You start with a magical, walking cauldron. It has a bit of an attitude.

21. Meatball Mystic: You start with a heap of Ground Unicorn Meat.


22. Flame Wizard: Master of the grill, you have eternal charcoal, stolen from the depths of hell’s ever-burning fire. Sometimes it screams when it burns.


23. Tofumancer: You start with silky smooth tofu made from actual clouds.


24. Salsa Salamander: You are a magical fire-lizard that specializes in hot-sauce. You start with 1d6 other-worldly peppers of increasing intensity. 


25. Vegan Vampire: You start with a barrel of ethically sourced blood from lab-grown meat. And sunglasses, for obvious reasons.

26. Juice Maguus:  You can make juices out of everything, even things that usually cannot be juiced. You start with a magical juicer, which may or may not be your pointy magic hat.

31. Savvy Summoner: You actually don’t know how to cook, but the creatures you can summon can, if you can control them enough to tell them *clearly* what to do.


32. Decanting Enchanter: You know all about wine, and start with 1d6 bottles of wines that are literally out of this world. Either the GM tells you where they are from or you come up with them yourself.


33. Cocktail Conjurer: You start with some magical shakers and a variety of strangely shaped glasses, straws, umbrella’s, etc. The shakers give you the ability to distill emotions. Now only to find a way to capture them!


34. Mushroom Goblin: In the deep and magical caves of the goblin kingdom, strange mushrooms grow with a multitude of strange effects. You have brought 1d6 different ones.


35. TV-Show Chef: You are not magic, you are just very entertaining when cooking good food. You start with a signed version of your latest cookbook.

36. Sauce-Medium: You perform Sauce-Seances in which you contact grandmothers from the past to learn their secret sauce recipes. Sometimes they seem a bit senile though.

41. Pastry-Prince(ss): You are surrounded by a cloud of little winged fairies that will follow your every command. You actually never cooked on your own before, and wouldn’t know which part of the knife to hold. You are very good at giving orders though.

42. Tomaturge: You have magical tomatoes. They are the size of basketballs and taste very fruity.


43. The Easter Bunny: You start with unlimited chocolate eggs. Where do they keep coming from? 


44. Jamming Gnome: Not only do you make some great jams and compotes, but you also make some good music while doing it! You start with 


45. Pickled Homunculus: You are a pickled homunculus and float in a big jar of brine, but are able to come out if needed. You are made out of pickled vegetables, which, in a pinch, can be used as ingredients.

46. Chocolate Charmer: You are able to instill feelings in your chocolates. You start with a crate full of raw cacao.

51. Fruit Ninja: You have two very sharp ninja blades and a box of various fruits to slice dramatically in the air.


52. Ghost of a Restaurant Cook: You can cook ghost-food, from ghost-ingredients (the ghost of a pig, the ghost of a carrot, …) dripping with ectoplasm! But even handling regular food or utensils is very challenging!


53. A Drunk: You don’t really know what’s going on, or how you got here. You vaguely remember signing something? The only thing you really know is that things will become more difficult to do if you don’t get a drink soon, because the headache is coming! You start with an empty bottle of whiskey.


54. Barbecue Beast: You are a Minotaur that’s into grilling! Skewers, steaks, drumsticks, fish, sausages, and some more exotic meats. You start with a fully plucked griffon, ready to be dressed, marinated and grilled. And a grill of course.


55. Goblin Bug Eater: You are a goblin that specializes in preparing food from bugs. The goblins even breed some special types of magical bugs. You start with 1d6 Strange Goblin Bugs. the GM will either tell you what they are, or ask you.

56. Drowned Pirate Captain: As a drowned pirate captain living at the bottom of the sea, you’ve become quite good at making sea-food. You start with 1d6 seafood treasures of the deeps. the GM will either tell you what they are, or ask you.

61. Magical Bakery Construct: You are a magically constructed being that is used as a baker. You start with a built-in oven and a vial of raw magic.


62. Barista Badger: You are a walking, talking badger that can make all-organic, natural coffee.You start with a sack of mystical coffee beans from your enchanted badger glade. 

63. Herbalist Harpy: You start with rare and magical herbs and spices. You usually use them to make calming teas and the like, but who knows what you can use them for in this competition.


64. Heavenly Cook: You are literally an angel. You start with a bag full of golden spoons to eat rice porridge with, as is tradition.


65. Garden Gnome: You are a gardening gnome and can make a pretty good salad! You start with a wheelbarrow of home grown garden vegetables.

66. The Muffin Man: You are really good at making walking, talking cookies, muffins, cupcakes and the like.

***

The arena consists of a circular area divided in six parts revolving around the Royal booth (A large tower with a 360° balcony) where the princess and her family sit. Once a recipe is done, it is brought up to her to taste it and hear her verdict. There are some guards there protecting her.

The full event will take 3 hours, with demands, surprises and complications brought on by the princess each half an hour segment.

THE PRINCESS DEMANDS… 

11. … an explanation on why you are doing what you are doing. Your booth mechanically rises to meet her at the balcony and explain why you are doing things the way you are doing it, or why you have chosen a certain ingredient.


12. … that you use a specific ingredient. She generously provides it to you. It is something that would go really well.


13. … that you make it sparkly.


14. … that your dish can move.


15. … that you use a specific ingredient. She generously provides it to you. It is something that would be difficult to incorporate.


16. … that you use a specific ingredient. She generously provides it to you. It is something that is near impossible to incorporate.



21. … that everybody dances!


22. … that everybody sings!


23. … that you tell an exciting story about the brave and beautiful princess Pumpernickel as you cook!


24. … that you do a fancy trick!


25. … that you tell a joke!


26. … that you start over from scratch!


THE PRINCESS IS GENEROUS


31. She gives you one of her guards as a helper.


32. She let’s you choose one of 1d6 ingredients to have added to your table.


33. She let’s you choose two of 2d6 ingredients to have added to your table.


34. She let’s you choose three of 3d6 ingredients to have added to your table.


35. She gives you a compliment.


36. Your starting resources are replenished.



41. You are in the spotlight! They all focus on you!


42. More time allowance! (an extra round)


43. More time allowance! (two extra rounds)


44. Coffee break!


45. She will invent a song about you on the spot!


46. You get a signed invitation to the ball!



THE PRINCESS IS BORED

51. Release the monkeys! (they steal)


52. The Floor is Lava! (Literally)


53. Make it dark! (Magical Darkness)


54. Zero Gravity Field! (everything starts floating and becomes more difficult to handle)


55. Thorny Vine Sprouts! (they obstruct and pierce)


56. Confetti Cannons! (colored paper and plastic falls from the sky)



61. Flood it! (Water starts to rise. When will it stop?)


62. Release the clowns! (they pester, mock and sabotage)


63. Switch tables with another player of her choice! You now work on that recipe!


64. Random ingredient is banned now!


65. Only use one arm, the others on your back!


66. Stand on one leg!

***

An unforeseen complication is the Mashed Potato Monstrosity now roaming around the arena, looking to devour and assimilate. If any of the players have rolled the Mash-o-mancer, this is their creature gone wrong. Otherwise it’s an NPC contestant. Optionally, play without the mishap and see what unfolds during play.

To see who the monster targets for the round, roll 3d6: 

3. The Princess’ Tower


4. Contestant 1


5. Contestant 1


6. Contestant 2


7. Contestant 2


8. Contestant 3


9. Contestant 3


10. Contestant 4


11. Contestant 4


12. Contestant 5

13. Contestant 5

14. Contestant 6

15. Contestant 6


16. The Live Audience

The monster tries to engulf and absorb, it can also try to terrify and slam things to try and break and destroy things. It needs 6 hits to be destroyed. When hit, a little bit is split off and runs of on its own, trying to cause havoc as well. It is only one hit to defeat that, and it does not split further.

***

DISCLAIMER: This is a first version, untested idea. I hope to test it some time and then see if I can make it into something for my itch.io store. 

RISUS on the Borderlands - The Nobles version 0.1

This is a continuation of converting Keep on the Borderlands to RISUS and my own silly sensibilities. In this post I cover the third of a whole list of character options that fit the setting's sensibilities.

What would be the collective term for Nobles? A Delusion of Nobles? Am I getting too political?

The Noble

Nobles in fairy tales are examples or hero’s. Or they are trapped in a tower, waiting to be rescued. Or pampered to such an extent that they cannot sleep if there is a pea under a hundred mattresses (and this is seen as a quality!). Adventuring nobles are usually on some sort of quest. Someone in their family has fallen ill, and they need to go and get the doo-dah to fix it. Usually they are kids or teens. 

Another approach is the cursed noble. They mistreat an old lady or were not hospitable to someone who happened to be somewhat supernatural, such as a witch or a fairy queen. Now they have a curse on them that is supposed to teach them a lesson of some kind. These nobles are confronted with their own privilege.

For a more extended fantasy story the recovery of stolen land or a stolen or lost heirloom might be a nice angle. The humor here might be in how it was lost or stolen. Thie recovery of stolen land fits within the Keep on the Borderlands backstory pretty well.

Being a noble, training is likely, although the inept noble is a fun trait as well. The RISUS Companion has the option of Sidekicks and Shield-Mates, which could come in handy here. Something like this might be suitable to have a noble that’s good at nothing but has a little army of servants doing all the things for them. Although I think this might just work as a bunch of cliches describing the servants, which the text in the companion also gives as an option. It’s the “three halflings in a trenchcoat” idea, which is already a good cliche in general.

Another trope that might suit might be the exiled or dethroned noble. This has the potential to put the game in a story modus immediately (giving a kind of plot), so check with the group if that is what you want to do. It could also just be something as flavor in the background and barely come up. Another variation is a noble in hiding. (probably with one distinctive feature, like a weirdly specific shaped mole on a strange place.

In some high fantasy settings being a noble might mean that you have different blood, perhaps even magical. Discus with the group wether or not you want this, because this can get into some ideologically sensitive material. It might be therapeutic to laugh with it, or it might just be too painful to be confronted with people being different only through heritage, like some sort of Übermensch or something.

On the Borderlands here, the local nobles are from the keep. Seeing as I’m already setting the place up as a small, mostly abandoned barony, nobles will be hard to come by. 


• Most of them might be Knights from an order, come to support the cause. 

• The Marquis might have children old enough to adventure and help out that way. Family dynamics are good motivators here, and sources of humor (again, make sure anyone at the table feels safe enough to indicate when some things hit a bit too close to home). They make for great hooks.

• There might be some kind of court being kept, so some courtiers might fit in here. The humor here might be how unfit courtiers are in this rugged environment or how courtiers that come from this kind of environment are different than regular courtiers. The court will be very small though, except perhaps for the boatload of knights the Marquis keeps or hosts.

Example Noble Characters:


This princess can do her own plumbing, thank you very much!

Princess Margareta van Wildewoud en Steenbergen

Tale:

As per tradition Margareta received all the training a noble lady should before being locked into a tower for a knight to come rescue her and consequently marry her. She only went along with it because there’s no real use in fighting tradition, but as soon as she was in het tower she escaped on her own, beating the troll guarding the tower with her secret judo skills learned from a self-study book on the topic, disguised a book on floral arrangements. 

Now free and a noble in hiding, she roams the forests and hills of the area, having adventures that are more like her style. Although, she does still like embroidery as a hobby, but she uses it not as most nobles do, with flowers and cute sayings like “Live Love Laugh”. Rather she likes to embroider things she encounters in her adventures, like skeletons, and monsters, and ruined castles. And sometimes she cannot help but put one of those little sayings on there as well. Her favorite one is a raven picking a grub from a corpse with the saying “The Early Bird Catches The Worm” on it.

Hook:

Every time her cover is blown she’s being approached by young noblemen trying to win her heart in marriage. (Especially Prince Friedrich von Rumpshine who can’t do anything without the help of a servant) She’s really not into that idea. Unfortunately, hiding is difficult, because she has the stereotypical extremely good looks that princesses in fairytales usually have. In this case hair that’s actually colored like gold and a mole on her cheek shaped like a cute little heart. Her eyes are a deep vibrant brown with golden flecks in it. Also, cute forest animals tend to want to help her. Safe to say, it’s hard to stay hidden.

• Beautiful fairytale princess in hiding from suitors (4) - tools of the trade: Many, many disguises, fairytale beauty, cute forest creatures that want to help wether she wants it or not.
• Secret Judo Master (4) - tools of the trade: A go and black belt, a self-study book for judo disguised as a book about floral arrangements
• Adventurous Embroiderer (2) - tools of the trade: needle and thread, a thimble, small scissors, an embroidery hoop and a cookie tin to keep it all in.
• Wildernis Survivalist (2) - tools of the trade: rope, sleeping bag, knife, a trap, a fishing pole …

This is actually a pretty accurate description of Prince Friedrich

Prince Friedrich von Rumpshine

Tale:
Looking for the love of his life, Princess Margareta van Wildewoud en Steenbergen, Prince Friedrich  has set out into these lands, as he had heard that she’d last been seen here. Being extremely inept, this would normally be a fools errant, except that he’s followed by a very capable flock of servants doing every last thing for him, as befits his position. He has heard the declines to his declarations of love, but interprets them in such a way that he needs to win her over, that she’s just playing hard to get. (This has potential to get creepy, so check in with everyone on this. In my case I’m building in a failsafe so he will not be able to succeed at this.)

Hook:
While his servants follow him out of obligation, they would follow Princess Margareta out of adoration. As such they will never aid von Rumpshine in actively hurting her, leaving him without ‘tools of the trade’ to use his cliches. All alone, without any relevant skills to speak of.

• Pampered Noble Used To Getting His Way (4) - tools of the trade: A gaggle of cooks, washerwomen, butt-wipers, lace-tiers, etc. to do everyday tasks for the noble. Also money.
• S&S (2 dice): Billy Quiverstick
• Renowned Bard (4) - tools of the trade: A lute and a honeyed voice. Fame.
• Hopeless Romantic (2) - tools of the trade: half-finished poems, pick-up lines, impeccable flower arrangements.
• S&S (1 die): Iron Brünhilde
• Intimidating Bodyguard (3) - tools of the trade: Scary armor, scarred face, unnecessarily spiky weapon
• S&S (2 dice): A Council of Advisors
• Groveling Yes-Men (and -Women) (3) - tools of the trade: low self esteem, political ambitions
• Backstabbing Politicians (3) - tools of the trade: knives for backstabbing, trained orators, speech writing material
• S&S (3 dice): Alfred the Alchemist
• Smelly Alchemist (4) - tools of the trade: Stinky ingredients of dubious origin, vials, candles, mystical paraphernalia
• Knower of Obscure and Esoteric Things (4) - tools of the trade: Many strange and obscure books
• Frail old Man (1) - tools of the trade: Cane, weak back.

RISUS on the Borderlands - The Crafter/Trader version 0.1

This is a continuation of converting Keep on the Borderlands to RISUS and my own silly sensibilities. In this post I cover the second of a whole list of character options that fit the setting's sensibilities. 

So many trades to choose from! Such diversity!

Crafts- and tradespeople

The village has some craftspeople, but not as many and as specialized as there would be in the cities. The crafts needed for self reliance are probably available, like weaving, basketweaving, some light carpentry/woodworking, some light building/masonry, spinning, some simple dying of cloth or making of paint. People will make their own clothes. 

There will not be doctors, smiths, barbers, etc. Though they might visit as traveling tradesmen once in a while. These tradesmen are more equipped to handle the dangers of the road through strength or guile. 

There is an innkeeper and tavern owner, because every fantasy game village needs to have those. The same with a shopkeep. Though these tend to be NPC's.

Requirement: Tale
Craftspeople are not usually the adventuring type. Tell us what caused you to (1) give up the trade and (2) take up the life of deadly adventure. 
This will gain you an automatic extra die to spend, as per the optional rule.

Some options to work with: 

• You heard about a mystical dwarf that is the master of your craft and how he teaches his dwarfish crafting magic to those he deems worthy. You think you are worthy! 
• Your shop has been ransacked by bandits and ruffians, you have to start all over again, and preferably not there. 
• You heard that if you include the hair of a unicorn’s tail into a woven garment, the one you gift it too will fall in love with you forever. 
• You can’t see yourself doing this same thing for the rest of your life. You’ve got a midlife crisis! 
• Your child has been kidnapped and you’re going to get her back.

Keep in mind what these trades are and how they could be funny while writing cliches. We’re playing RISUS after all! What does the trade or craft imply? What is the stereotype? Do you subvert it or enforce it? Trade skills also have great potential to be inappropriate cliches while adventuring in dungeons and the like. How would a cliche be funny to use inappropriately?

A potter might always have dirty hands, making not leaving traces more difficult, but probably makes making a quick sign on a wall easier. A weaver might always be fidgeting with some thread. A traveling potion seller might smell a bit … off, but tries to hide it by covering themselves in perfume. They might take in their craft or be very humble about it. Etc. Etc.

---

Example Crafter/Trader Characters:

Here he is, just making pot after pot after pot in his little room.

Muddy Maurice

Tale:
Muddy Maurice is a middle aged potter that works with clay from the river. He goes and gets it there himself. Working with clay he tends to always be muddy. Muddy hands, muddy feet, mud stained clothes… He left his kiln and his pots to go adventuring because he felt like he got stuck in his work and wasn’t finding any more joy in it. He needed to try new things, experience new things, so as to get to the next level in his life. In other words, a midlife crisis. He traded some of his pottery for adventuring gear and set out for new experiences!

Maurice is a(n)…

• Muddy-Handed Potter (4) - tools of the trade: Kiln, Pots, Clay, Pottery Wheel, pottery workshop (also home), clay working tools, dirty clothes, probably also a shovel and a wheelbarrow.
• Surprisingly Graceful Swimmer (3) - tools of the trade: A medieval speedo
• Lifelong Bachelor (3) - tools of the trade: An iron stomach, problems with commitments, an aversion to settling down.
• Midlife-Crisis Adventurer (1) - tools of the trade: Backpack filled with adventuring tools he heard he needed, leather jacket, heavy club, crippling self doubt.

---

Hilde is unimpressed by yet another suitor...

Hilde

Tale:
Hilde is what they call an old spinster. This is because she is very good at spinning all kinds of yarn or thread, be it literally or figuratively. Also, it’s because she still isn’t married at age 30! It’s not like suitors haven’t presented themselves over the years, but rather that she was never impressed by them. Tiering of this she has set out to find a real man in the wildernis of the borderlands. She’s hoping that one of these adventuring men will be made of the right stuff to marry her.

Hilde is a(n)…

• Old Spinster looking for a Real Man (4) - tools of the trade: Yarn, Wool, thread, spindle whorl, judging eyes, high expectations
• Gossip Girl (2) - tools of the trade: good ears and a wicked tongue
• Creative Knitting Woman (3) - tools of the trade: Knitting needles, balls of yarn
• Beginning Adventurer (2) - tools of the trade: Heavy walking stick (good for whacking), backpack full of handy knickknacks, hopes and dreams

RISUS on the Borderlands - The Farmer version 0.1

This is a continuation of converting Keep on the Borderlands to RISUS and my own silly sensibilities. In this post I cover the first of a whole list of character options that fit the setting's sensibilities. 

Aren't they jolly and fun!

Farmers

Farmers come in all shapes and sizes. Some make things grow, others keep farm animals. Usually you know what to do with the produce. Most do a bit of everything, but some might experiment with specializing. Or at least dream of it, aspiring to one day be able to specialize in one thing. 

Requirement: Tale

Farmers are not usually the adventuring type. Tell us what caused you to (1) give up the life of a farmer and (2) take up the life of deadly adventure. 
This will gain you an automatic extra die to spend, as per the optional rule.

Some options to work with (but feel free to come up with your own): 

• You accidentally burned down your farm. 
• Goblins stole your favorite chicken, and you want it back. 
• You had a vision or dream where you were chosen for a great task. 
• Wolves have been eating your herd, and now it’s time for revenge. 
• Raiders have stolen your husband! 
• You heard that if you catch a Leprechaun you can force it to give you his treasure, and you like treasure! 
• You didn’t shelter an old crone, she cursed you and now your crops all uprooted themselves and walked into the woods, on their own!

Farmers are usually hearty and healthy, strong because of their work. Some might know letters and numbers and be able to write their own name. Farmers tend to be good with their hands, and be able to craft simple things for themselves (see craftsmen). Farmers might dabble a bit in fishing or hunting. Especially if some predators are out to get their chickens or their sheep. Music is also a thing that is liked, as well as turning their produce into tastier things, like bread, cheese and beer, which is used for another beloved activity, namely feasting. There are a lot of tropes about farmers, which could be used to fuel your cliche writing inspiration.

Most farmers will have one cliché at 3 max and all others below, since they tend to do everything on their own, being self-sufficient. You are required to have at least one cliche that has to do with farming if you want to play a farmer. It can be at 1, if you want to be a particularly bad farmer. Most have multiple farming related cliches though.

Optional Rule: Hard Working

At the cost of 1 die at character creation this character gets the Hard Working trait, meaning they can re-roll any 1’s, but only on any roll made for doing continuous hard and mindless physical labor such as lugging things around, plowing, mowing, chopping.

 

Example Farmer Characters:

Look any this handsome lad.
I'd wager he's still got all of his teeth.

Hannes

Tale: 

Hannes once was fishing, as he likes to do on a Sunday after mass. It was at this point that all of a sudden the face of a beautiful lady emerged from the water and told him that there are many treasures hidden in the caves that go up the road. Hannes explained that he couldn’t really leave his widowed mother all alone to look after the farm. The lady in the water told him that the treasure could make his widowed mother into a queen that could have anything she wanted. Hannes loves his mother very much and thinks this is a good idea, so he leaves right away.

Hannes is a(n) …

• Gullible but strong farmboy (3) - 
tools of the trade: Hopes and Dreams, farm, plow, rake, …
• Animal Friend, especially to his cow Mathilda (2) - tools of the trade: Big Heart, bag of treats
• Singing Harvester (2) - tools of the trade: knowledge of simple songs, scythe
• Handsome Lad (2) - tools of the trade: Rosy Cheeks, athletic build, sincere eyes, all of his teeth
• Recreational Fisherman (1) - tools of the trade: Fishing Line
• Hard Worker (see optional rule)

A bit like this, but imagine a spiked mace instead of a sword.
And imagine her being very clumsy in it.

Iron Anna

Tale:
Annabelle, being a buxom dairy maid, got a lot of attention from the soldiers, mercenaries and other adventurers coming through. This filled her head with dreams about the world outside and the riches and fame to gain out there. She would sings songs about it while dreaming about going on adventures on her own. One day she ran off with a mercenary called Iron Willem, and started adventuring for good. Iron Willem ended up dying, about right as they left the village. Such is the adventuring life. Especially if you made an enemy in the Bandit King like Iron Willem did. Annabelle was undeterred and kept going, seeking adventure and fame. With the tools that Willem left her in death she outfitted herself with re-forged plate armour (from Dead Iron Willem’s purse) and his spiked mace and set out to become Iron Anna. Which is where we are right now. She’s still figuring these things out.

Annabelle is a(n)…

• Buxom Milk Maid (3) - tools of the trade: Buxom Bossom, Milk Pail, Three Legged Stool, Wooden Shoes, a Cow.
• Bored Cheese Monger (2) - tools of the trade: Cheese Cloth, Bottle of Rennet, Cheese Press, a Cheese Cellar.
• Dreamy Songstress (2) - tools of the trade: Hopes and Dreams, A Good Voice.
• Optimistic Go-Getter (2) - tools of the trade: Hope and Energy
• Reluctant Housewife in Training (1) - tools of the trade: Broom, Apron, Rolling Pin, Cooking Knives, Family Cookbook, …
• Iron Clad Adventurer looking for Fame and Glory (1) - tools of the trade: Plate Armor, Spiked Mace.
• Lucky shots: OOOOOO

RISUS on the Borderlands - General Idea version 0.1

 Yup, I'm at it again, reworking the Borderlands, and again, using RISUS. I got inspired by someone talking about running modules for RISUS on the RISUS Discord Channel. And the idea didn't leave my head. I've recently read the RISUS Dungeonautica rules which were a big inspiration as well. Anyway, I'm not sure if I'll ever finish this project, but I'm trying to convert what I like from Keep on the Borderlands to RISUS, with it's own kind of humor. To make something really feel like a RISUS interpretation I feel like it needs to be funny/silly. I'm not sure how good I am at that, but I'll give it go.

I'm keeping a list of sorts (kind of like a table of contents) below this post!

this is a castle, or a keep, if you will.

The Keep on the Borderlands - RISUS Edition

The Mark is a savage place, corrupted by Chaos, making men, beasts and nature itself give in to dark desires, like greed, violence and even stand up comedy!

Standing against this is the Marquis, castellan to the keep on these borderlands. With an iron fist she brings law to this savage land, protecting mankind from the evils that live in the dark. Helping her are her two advisors, one from the Church and one from the Realm of Fairy. They help her decide when to tighten her iron grip, and when to loosen it up a bit.

The Inquisitor from the church is a stern looking man that never smiles and always looks in judgement. The Fair Child is a 100 year old child trained in combat and magic alike. They also like to play tricks on people. They look like they are five years old. They are always smiling.

Changes to the original keep:

The outer keep becomes a little village built against the walls of the keep, which is now just the inner keep from the module. Most people live in farms between the road and the river, which are the main source of food for the Keep. This also means that there are less men at arms around. The keep is still built on a rock jutting out of the ground, but the rest of the village is built around the rock that’s jutting out that ground, negating some of that crevice-moat-idea. But if the rock jutting up is a Really High Rock (5) that should be okay I think.

 

Starting Characters

Characters are made with 10 dice like normal. The options from the main rules are all available, and required in some cases (see below). For characters choosing the Hooks and Tales options, it might be fun to work together and make up backstories that lead in the same direction, so that it would make sense for you guys to be working together as a party.

Extra Option: For a more authentic feel, some might think a 10 dice character might be a bit too heroic and advanced. For a more Zero-to-Hero kind of feel, start with only 5 dice and set the maximum of a cliché to 3. This is meant to be an option that is for the entire group, but if a specific type of player wants to challenge themselves more like this, they are of course free to take this all on their own, I guess.

Most people here are humans. These are human lands. Any other beings are either very rare visitors from the fairy lands or creatures of corruption. Or Wizards. Wizards are rare to come by. People that are not humans will have specific requirements for use as characters, such as a hook or a tale. Others might as well, such as the farmer, who generally isn’t the deadly adventuring sort.

• Humans in this area are either farmers, simple craftsmen or warriors of some kind (mainly soldiers, knights and mercenaries).
• There is a little parish here with a priest and acolytes which could provide that avenue as a viable player option, and traveling priests are a thing. 
• The simple people here are living in tough conditions, which probably makes them quite tough on their own, compared to the ones living in the more tamed regions of the kingdom. This might provide hunters, not only of common animals, but of things that others might just think lives in make belief.
• Sometimes some people here are born a bit different. Tainted by the corruption of chaos, or influenced from meddling by the fairy lands.

Currently Available (links open in a new window):

The Farmer

The Crafter/Trader

Weird Idea #2 - Vocalizing Choruses

Michael Hartstein’s “When a Choir Sings, The World Stops and Listens.”

I'm here again with a Weird Idea nobody asked for. Once more it's based on music. I was recently pointed at some strange music group called A Room Full of Teeth and decided to give them a listen on Spotify. I loved it. It's Fantastically Weird, being all vocalizing with maybe some synthesized chords in the background once in a while, but mostly just the voice doing weird stuff, like Tibetan throat singing and Yodeling. 

So I'm listening and my imagination starts running, GM brain activating. This sounds sufficiently creepy to be something to put on when in a strange different place: 

A haunted mausoleum, where all the corpses start singing nonsense, filling everyone with dread, destroying sanity room by room, forcing steel checks, whatever your system. If you fail, the haunt takes control and you join the song ... forever.

A eerie fairy forest where the voices are heard, but not found. (Or what would happen if you did find them?) Some strange type of fairy music magic that tries to capture you, plays with you, for some incomprehensible reason. What do you need to do to escape? Sing a counter-song? Hit the right notes? Hide from any sound? What happens if you emerge from the captivity? Can you even still stand sounds? Have years passed, or just mere seconds? Did your voice change or get stolen?

Inside the dream of a bard or minstrel or other music mage. All the voices are different aspects of their inner self, vying for control, sensing around. Some might even be the spells themselves, in a "Vancian" way. Or is this how a bard finds their special songs, transported via musical trance to a place where songs are real and need to be captured, or understood, or translated to sheet music. The amount of success with which this is done defines the strength of the musical spell?

Anyway. This was this edition's weird ideas.

De waarde van de grote schat: The Third Game.

I drew out the path as we went along.
Kinda forgot about it at the guardian.

 

So, last Wednesday I played "De waarde van de grote schat" with the kids from my third school. These are two kids. It's the first time that they chose option B: to go treasure hunting on behalf of someone else, helping them with the hunt. I was exited for this, as I could try out my twist ending. Also, the rate of selfishness/altruism so far is 2/1. Definitely need a bigger test pool to see what the average would be.

So they named their characters and their friend. I asked who it was. Did they know them or was it a stranger? Did they grow up with them? They decided that he was a very trustworthy friend. They gave him a silly name, since they had no inspiration for a regular name. Thus we met Karboeb. (I had to keep a straight face here because it's pronounced "Kar-Boob".)

The also started by asking wether this was in modern day times or in the medieval times. I told them we could decide this on our own. The choose the medieval times "because that's more realistic". I am still baffled by that leap of logic.

The Countryside

Leaving the unnamed village (I should let them name it themselves, but that might eat up precious time. Maybe I should come up with a name.) they traversed the countryside where they heard cries for help and saw smoke in the distance. A farm was on fire. They decided to help.

Design note: I wonder if they would have done so if there was a timer of sorts, or something else to make the choice harder. Like competition. Maybe something like Willy Wonka's Golden Ticket.

A quick draw up, which my target audience might not think of to do.

They arrive on the scene, which I quickly improvise and draw up. Giving it three buildings on fire: The main living quarters, the stables and the shed. The farmers where an older couple who they could not understand in their panicked heavy dialect. They were pointing to the main building, but the kids were like "We need to save the horses!". As I asked them if there would be people in the main building, they reacted that if there were people inside the older couple would have already tried to save them.

It was then I realized this group was definitely smarter than the kids I usually play with.

Since I was improvising I could roll with it. So I asked them how they would try to put out the fire. They asked if there was a well somewhere. Or different water somewhere.

Yup, definitely the smart group.

So I rule that with the five of them (the two PC's, their friend and the two farmers) they would be able to make a bucket chain and ask them which house first. As said before, the stables. Because horses! After the stables the choice was the main house or the shed. They asked what was in both. I told them the house is where people lived and there might still be people in it. The shed is where the food is.

They actually almost went for the shed first, arguing that they would have heard it if someone was in need. So I suggested they roll to see if they could hear something. They heard the faint crying as if from a baby. Well, plans changed quickly. The baby's life was deemed more important than the food, and they went to douse the fire in the house. Actually one of the PC's who had some skill in strength didn't want to waste time with water and kicked in the door, action hero style and found not only a baby, but a teenager that was passed out, who had to be on the way to the baby. He was able to carry them all out while the rest managed to douse the fire.

I then cranked up the fire in the shed and they got it out as well, but not without some lost food, which they were sad about. They got rewarded with two horses though! (they got a choice between horses or food) 

Teacher Note: I wonder if they thought they could figure out a way to save everyone and everything perfectly? I wonder if this scenario would be too cruel if things would go wrong with their rolls?

Design Note: I was able to improvise this quickly, because I am used to the hobby. My target audience are protestant and evangelical teachers though, who for the most part will not even have a frame of reference for this. If they've heard from it, it will most likely be in a negative way. So they will not be used to this. It would be a good idea to make each of these events actually prepped instead of just a prompt, for those that want to use it.

The Forest

So then they went to the forest, where brigands jumped from the bushes. "Your money or your life!", they shouted. Having previously discovered how smart she was, one player's character pretended like she was gonna give them her money but then patted her coat. "I could swear it was here! I must have dropped it over there!" They fell for it and went back to where she pointed. Instead of just riding along, the strong character which already saved people from a burning house snuck after them and with a branch knocked them both out cold. Then they robbed the robbers, finding gold jewelry and the like and taking their weapons and distributing these amongst themselves, reasoning who would be best with what, etc. This dealt with they went on ahead to the cave.

The Cave

Arrived at the cave they find that the entrance to the cave is very narrow. They cannot take much with them, but as established, they are too smart for me. They take some time to build a shelter for their horses and camouflage it. Then they tie their horses to it so they are safe while they go spelunking. I told them they could not get through the narrow opening without leaving everything behind, but they retorted with ... "What if we tie it all up in a package and throw it through first?" I mean, I gotta reward their cleverness, so sure. And then I ask them to roll to see how fast they are. They are just fast enough to see a little mantake the pakket and run. Immediate pursuit. Being able to capture the little gnome by the feet right as he dove into a hole they fish him out and grab the bag back. They then buy his services with a necklace, and proceed to the guardian.

Design Note: Smart kids vs. improvisation... I resort to standard fantasy and fairy tale, which I'm trying to avoid in the finished product. I think having it be a creature like a fox or something would've been better. Also, man, bundeling their stuff up and throwing it through. Nice one. I wanna just play some OSR sandbox stuff without any agenda with these kids, but that's not an option currently.

Teacher Note: Impressed that they thought out of the box, but it kind of defeated the purpose of the exercise. At least they had to leave behind their horses, so I'll take that. I might have to have a little think to make this more enforceable. I want to make it kind of like the idea of the "eye of the needle gate", because they should have to think what they are willing to sacrifice to gain entrance.

The Guardian

Here they met a fully armored knight who opens up his visor to reveal, a skull! *GASP* I immediately asked if it was too scary (I can change it if it's too scary), because they reacted more strongly than I expected. It turned out to be okay once the undead knight revealed that he could only let them pass if they would win a game of Rock Paper Scissors from him. They were up to the task and reached for their dice while I made a fist and started the rime on my hand. "Oh, we're really playing it?!" And it was fun. Which is also what the skeleton said, as he hadn't been able to play for the last 100 years. One player lost but the other won, and the knight opened his chest armour and from between his ribcage retrieved a golden key.

Design Note: Again, better to have these things prepared. I definitely went too hard into the fantasy here, and somehow hadn't foreseen their reaction to a living talking skeleton. The document so far just said guardian. I'd used a dragon in the two previous ones, but wanted to try something else. I think this should be some kind of fantastical encounter though, as it's the end. Maybe I should make it into a giant statue that comes to life to challenge the players? Or a mirror, where they have interact with their own reaction or answer some difficult questions or something. I'll have to give this a good think.

Teacher note: DnD and videogames make you forget how actually horrifying of an idea undead are, even in their simple form. Be careful with falling back on fantasy tropes, especially with an audience for which it aren't tropes yet! Again as well, fantasy and my target audience don't always mix. So the above idea of "your own reflection" might be more apt. It could also be a mechanical thing where they have to solve a puzzle, like a maze or a sudoku or something, but I dunno about that. Sudoku will be too hard I think.

The Treasure

All of a sudden they did not trust their trustworthy friend any longer. They thought he was involved in some dark stuff with this skeleton knight and such. Once the friend asked if he could please have the key because it had been so long since he'd seen her, the players went "Her???" Wait a minute. They asked him to explain, which he did. A wizard had kidnapped his girlfriend and put a curse on him where he couldn't tell about it. The players started testing this story (which I was coming up with on the fly) by asking if they knew about this. Well, they knew he had a girlfriend, and now that they thought of it, they hadn't seen her for a full month or something like that.

Design Note: Again with the fantasy tropes. This is not something I can write for my target audience. These are also the consequences of my previous choices, making me dig myself in deeper and deeper. It's harder to foresee something here though, and the kids define their relationship with their quest giver themselves. Maybe I should make it a more formal statement. As with the Golden Ticket idea. Not sure.

Teacher note: So smart again! Just mentioning her instead of it and they immediately caught on to it. The reveal worked amazingly. Not sure this will work for all of them all the time, but maybe it doesn't need to. You can always increase the revealing. I might also be underestimating my other students a bit. Not sure. There are some very distracted kids there.

Rulers of Pegolia 2023 - Conclusion

 While the game has so much story potential if I keep it running, it was running me into the ground. There was too much time being spent on resolving the actions of all the players, so with the upcoming vacation, and a major event that actually fits in my lessons, I called it quits for this school year.

But don't let me keep the happenings from you guys:

WEEK 4: Plans for Peace

The biggest event here is that Empress Chlor from Messias pulled all her spies back from everywhere and made a big announcement: "Sorry that I sent spies. I was afraid you guys wanted to hurt me. I'm organizing a party to apologize. Will you come?" She hopes this will calm down all of the unrest in her empire. 

The workers who are working on her wall are still upset that there are no more workers. They ask her if she cannot order all of those returned spies to come and help out.

And the spy from The Dark Woods escapes.

***

In other news, King Jayden from The North Sea on Land decided to ask tell Emperor Shibi Js from Bradj that he can help him recover his lost researchers. The researchers have not sent any more messages.

He took all of his remaining forces to look for his disappeared army troops, being able to track them down to the hill they disappeared on. They saw the footprints from the battle with the giant and saw that on the holy hill (they don't know it's a holy hill) the footprints just stop. No other sign of where they might be.

***

Emperor Alex of Signapour keeps building his walls, trades Vibranium for water with Sliefingtime and tries to set up a second trade agreement with the Empire of Israël.

***

Berticobella the Big Love-Haver always has a big lists of actions, and a lot to react to. She did a smart thing and automated some things, so that I'd know what to do in case she wouldn't be there. 

She would ALWAYS give water to Signapour and IF beavers would build a dam in her river, her soldiers would be dispatched to destroy the dam.

She found and rescued her workers that fell into the underground sea. They ask her what she wants to do? Keep working on the road? block off the sea? Investigate the sea? 

She received Vibranium which immediately got used by the craftsmen to make the fence. They worked it like they were born to and were able to make all parts from this one load of Vibranium. They now started the assembly process, which would take a while.

The search for the source of magical energy succeeded. They found the magical flower, brewed the tea from it and the researcher that drank it became an oracle of sorts, getting visions from time to time, including the right way to go. They found the source, a crystalline tree with what looked like a lightning bolt trapped inside of it. They asked how things should progress. Pull power lines to the tree? Take the tree to the city? Or take a seed so they can grow their own?

Her spies tell her of the big search in The North Sea on Land and some of her captured spies tried to escape. One didn't get an opportunity, another got caught but one managed to escape.

***

Prince Wildekind keeps setting traps around his domain while his mouse spy escapes from captivity and returns.

***

Empress Lauris tries to calm her people down by giving a speech. She discovered a talent for oration but fails to convince her people by words alone. She also leads a search for her missing troops but cannot find them.

***

Emperor Shibi Js does nothing. His dragon egg starts moving!

WEEK 5: The End

I had told the kids that this would be the last round, as I was spending up to four hours on this game by now in my precious free time.

King Jayden does nothing.

***

Empress Chlor finally succeeds in her efforts. Due to signing a peace accord (which was agreed to by all parties in real time in class) her people calm down and celebrate. She promises to put her spies on work duty only to then in the same action pull them back out to search for the escaped mouse spy. The workers are not happy with this.

***

Emperor Alex finishes the walls to protect him from a possible volcano eruption! His builders are also experts in building with Vibranium now.

***

Berticobella the little love-haver finally finishes the first part of her road. She investigates the underground lake/sea and discovers a netwerk that spreads underground for miles, possibly right under the other kingdoms as well. The shadows in here seem to have a life of their own though. A rough map is made for her by her expert scouts.

She orders her special tree to be brought to the kingdom, protected by her spies. They bump into the lost army of Empress Lauris though, and then the search party of Empress Lauris, looking for her lost army! A standoff!

She uses the intelligence gotten from the North Sea On Land to save the trapped researchers. They don't want to go back to King Jayden, but prefer to stay with her. She searches for the other lost army from the same kingdom but cannot find it. They seem to have disappeared, as by magic!

***

Prince Wildekind finished trapping his domain.

***

Empress Lauris' people also react relieved to the peace treaty signed. Her search party for her lost troops finds them, while being confronted by Sliefingtime's ninja's carrying a glass lighting tree? What?

***

Emperor Sjibi Js does nothing still and his dragon egg cracks, spilling fire that sets fire to his laboratory!

***

THE END

Rulers of Pegolia 2023 - Week 3 Update

 The map hasn't really changed since last time, so no updated image for that.

King Jayden of The North Sea on Land:

The king ignored his researchers trapped by the giant Lobsters (I said crabs before, but I was wrong, I had given him the news that it were lobsters). They ask for help again. They sound desperate. (And secretly their trust in their ruler is plummeting rapidly)

Meanwhile he divides his armies and sends 1/8th of his army to the Empire of Bradj and 1/8th to the Empire of Israël. The ones traveling to Bradj do well and turn out to devise para-gliding vehicles to be able to traverse the mountains easily. They send message of their arrival and ask what to do, because their king asked to send the army there, but not what for. Is he bolstering their troops? Attacking them? What is expected? 

The ones traveling to Israel have less fortune. The stumble on a giant that causes them losses and then try another way, over the holy ground in C4, where they end up in a strange mist and ... disappear. Not that the king knows any of that. He just knows that they haven't sent word of their safe arrival... weird.

After all this, these are the hidden stats:

• Tags: Extra Food, Plummeting Trust in the Research Team, The Lost Army Troop
• Project: Expansion to A4 (ongoing?)
• Discovering (2)
• Army (2) - Speedy Troops (3) - Airborne Soldiers (4)
• XP: 0

Empress Chlor of Messias:

She had ignored her subjects letting her know they were scared. This results in protests.

She ignored the message that there were not enough workers for her wall. They carried on none the less, getting even better at their job but getting angry for not receiving help.

Her spies found out that Emperor Alex is sick, small armies are moving from The North Sea on Land towards Israel and Bradj. The captured spies in Bradj and Israel escape and ask wether to return or keep spying. The spie she sent to the Dark Wood return with a weird message that the Prince is fine with playing hide and seek. It's his turn now! spies are found in her own empire as well as they tried to sneak in. One from Sliefingtime and one from the Dark Woods (A mouse with a silver cape, kind of a dead giveaway). But also a spy from Bradj carrying a bomb! While this is concerning, she now gets a free bomb!

She asked for help, but did not write down who she asked it from, so I had her counsel give her different suggestions (negotiate a peace treaty, focus on your own population because they are freaking out, or war because they can't trust us anymore due to our spies being discovered). I think she's freaking out a bit that it's going bad, but she does not see how bad the others are messing up too.

After all this, these are the hidden stats:

• Tags: Tension with Israel, Subjects are Scared, Not Enough Workers, Angry Workers, Protests (Against the Military), Bomb (from Bradj)
• Spying (2) - Discovering Secrets (3)
• Working (2) - Building (3)
• Spies safe in The North Sea on Land and Signapour.
• XP: 0

Emperor Alex of Signapour:

The player was sick this weak, so the emperor is as well. He cannot make decisions, but ongoing projects continue.

The Vibranium Walls are built around more of his cities, making them safer.

A Para-gliding army has been spotted in D1, heading for the Empire of Bradj it seems. The spotters couldn't determine whose army it was.

The council was actually very good in taking over for him while sick. They discovered their talent for this.

After all this, these are the hidden stats:

• Tags: Rumbling Volcano
• Building (2)
• Councelors (2)
• Project: Vibranium Walls (2/4).
• XP: 1

Berticobella, the Small Lover of Sliefingtime:

The Small Lover has some projects going, and spends most of her time reacting to them.

The building of the tunnel under the holy site is approved and the builders try to finish it but OH NO! Disaster! They dig into an underground cavern and fall way way down into an underground sea. One guy managed to stay from falling and went to report. She's gonna save these guys? Right?

The magical fence is being worked on as well. She instructed the people to go to a place she's heard of that has a magical flower. If you find that flower, it will show you the way to a source of magical power. They could not find it this week, but are willing to keep looking.

She also realized that if she's got the only key to the city, her spies, or anyone else for that matter, would have a hard time going in and out of the cities. She asks for face scanners, and her researchers find that, not only can they do this, they are pretty good at inventing as well!

The workers for the project on the walls ask if any Vibranium has been obtained yet (it has not).

Then she also joins the spy game: Her spies get in safe to The North Sea on Land, Signapour and The Dark Woods (impressively enough). They get found out in Israel, Messias and Bradj. She learns about the troop movements of King Jayden, the illness of Emperor Alex (and that his project is halfway done), and that Prince The Wild Child is reinforcing his domain with traps. Their spies learned a lot from this.

Troop movement is spotted on the river as Israel's army is trying to pass. They are unwilling to pay the tax so they take their ships to land and carry them inside the forest.

After all this, these are the hidden stats:

• Tags: Holy Ground, Subterranean Sea, Lost Workers.
• Researching (2) - Inventing (3)
• Building (2)
• Spies (2) - Infiltrating (3)
• Project: Road (0/3)
• Project: Research Magical-Electric Fence (1/3)
• XP: 2 

Prince Wild Child of the Dark Woods:

I returned the Spy from Messias thinking it a game. I send my own spy which immediately gets caught.

I realized I was unfair last time, making others have entire projects for reinforcing their domains with walls, while I just one-turn reinforced with traps. So I made it a project, in which I advanced.

After all this, these are the hidden stats:

• Project: Trapped Forest (2/4)
• Hunting (2)
• XP: 1

Empress Lauris of Israel:

She ignored a caught spy and it escaped.

She caught a spy from the country of Sliefingtime. What will she do with it?

She ignored the protests. They keep going on and even become violent!

She sends her army to the empire of Bradj. They refuse to pay taxes so decide to carry the boats into the woods where they get lost. (They discover they are pretty good as an army though!). She does not know any of this. She only knows she does not receive any word from them. Weird...

After all this, these are the hidden stats:

• Tags: Tension with Messias, Scared of Messias, Violent Protests (Scared of Messias), Lost Army.
• Army (2)
• XP: 2

Emperor Shibi Js of Bradj:

He ignored the captured spy, which escaped.

He caught a new spy, this time one from Sliefingtime. What will he do? (I forgot to put that in his overview. I will need to fix this.)

He wants to 'discover new eyes' but fails. I tell him that if gives more details of how he tries to do this, he has a higher chance of success.

He wants to send spies into Messias to plant a bomb but fails. The spies, and the bomb are captured. His troops learn from this experience for the next time.

An army not only arrives. It paraglides over the mountains and stands to wait. They are from The North Sea on Land. What do you do?

After all this, these are the hidden stats:

• Dragon's Egg
• Spies (2)
• XP: 1

Rulers of Pegolia 2023 - Week 2 Update.

 

The current state of the game world

The result of the second week of gameplay are in and parsed (as I had some time for it today). As it stands I need some 2 hours each week for this, which is too much to sell it to other teachers, especially those not familiar with roleplaying. But I'm having fun at least! That counts for something.

Let's see, starting at row A, and moving down from left to right we have King Jayden first, followed by Empress Lauris and Empress Chlor, then Emperor Alex, Berticobella, Emperor Shibi Js and finally The Wild Child. I didn't specifically tackle them in that order, which makes me think that I might have to make a rule about who goes first, since that can have influence on what happens. Just a little side-note to think about.

King Jayden of The North Sea on Land

King Jayden, the poor guy, sent out this cheery letter introducing himself and the name of his country (Oh, I see I have to edit that on the map!) to everyone, only to get a letter that says "Hi king Jayden, so what's the name of your country?" and another confusing one asking him to join a war. Luckily I was already planning on having my character being glad with just a friendly greeting (he might be feral, but he's just a kid living in the wild. Having friends is fun!). 

Also, he's the only kid that has no others in religion class, being the only Protestant in his year, so unlike the other classes, he doesn't have this same idea of others moving around in the world, actively thinking, as the other groups do. So yeah, my character was like, what the heck, let's send him a gift of our surplus food (delivered on a cart pulled by stags, while a fox wearing a silver cape delivered a letter saying "Hey Jayden! Me Wildekind! Enjoy Food!"

He also took an action, deciding to try and expand his kingdom to A4, but his scouts are accosted and cornered by giant crabs (the size of horses!) and ask for help. In this, his scouts also learned some valuable lessons about preventing this type of thing in the first place, gaining Exploration (2) as a skill, (though none of the kids know any of the skills).

Empress Lauris of the Empire of Israel

Empress Lauris mainly sent out some letters. One letter to King Jayden, about which I wonder if she means to act as if she didn't receive his previous letter or if she was not paying attention. Chances are 50/50. But the other letter was sent to Emperor Alex, agreeing that help might be nice, as well as trade. She didn't specifically say she was after his Vibranium, but he's the only one currently holding that resource. 

She didn't really take any other action, no building or scouting or researching or anything. So I rolled for an event. Her people got more upset with their proximity to Messias that they were holding protest marches, especially since they could see soldiers moving throughout the Empire of Messias.

To make things even more interesting a spy from the Empire of Messias was caught sneaking into the Empire and is now in prison. She will have to decide what to do with them.

Not doing things is not gaining her any skills. If she doesn't pick it up she's gonna lag behind quickly.

Empress Chlor of the Empire of Messias

Empress Chlor, oh boy. Being unsure of wether or not her allies were lying to her or being true friends, she went hard into the spy game (failing enough to level up twice in a single turn!). The only one she seems to be really trusting is Berticobella, to whom she entrusted her entire plan. But yeah, she's acting from a feeling of being cornered.

Her actions were deploying soldiers (which frightened the general population), trying to build walls around her kingdom, (but it turned out a lot of the workers were drafted into said army) and sending out spies to everyone (except, I'm assuming, Berticobella, to which she wrote her entire plan in a message). 

The Kingdom of Bradj immediately discovers her, as was the case in the Empire of Israel and the Dark Woods. In The North Sea on Land she discovered the plans for expansion and the current trouble with the enormous crabs and in Signapour she discovered the Vibranium Walls being built to deal with possible volcanic disaster.

Through all this she learned Spying (2), Discovering Secrets (3) and Building (2) throughout this one action. The spy game seems to be scary in this type of game. In a previous iteration someone also burned all her bridges by having spies uncovered. What will the fallout be now?

Emperor Alex of the Empire of Signapour

Emperor Alex mainly tries to deal with the volcano. He had expressed concerns, asking me in class if he needed to move his entire country. I said that's definitely one option, but there are probably other things he could do, especially with that Vibranium he has. He decided to build walls around his cities using the material. Their builders did great and discovered their talent with building. I set the project at a four week project.

Other than that he got the reply from Empress Lauris, which we've already handled there.

Berticobella the Small Love-Haver
of Sliefingtime

Berticobella mainly focused on answering mail, forgetting that she needed to make decisions for the projects she has running. She messaged both Lauris and Chlor that she is joining them in their war against Bradj. 

She is receiving Chlor's plans this week.

Project wise, I had the project mangers roll for decisions. The Foreman leading the roadworks had a stroke of genius and decided to make a tunnel, digging deep enough so that it would not desecrate the holy site. It will take longer, but they can keep following orders without having to desecrate a holy space. 

The research on the Magical Lightning Fence with Magical Key didn't receive instruction on what to do, so they decided to go with the easiest first. They found a way to conduct magical energy and turn it into electricity. Guess what special material they need for it though? Vibranium. She will have to obtain some Vibranium somehow to be able to make her entire wall. How will she do this?

Emperor Shibi Js of the empire of Bradj

Emperor Shibi Js keeps sending out letters to try and recruit, even though the once he resends them to haven't even had the chance to reply (that is what they do in this action). He resends his offer to Wildekind and ups the ante, offering five of his best eyes for help in the war. He also invites King Jayden to the war with a very confusingly written message.

He gets a message back from The Wild Child this turn. (so he will read this with the other results) which is a boar with a silver cape carrying a satchel containing a broken spear and a letter saying "Hi Shibi! Me Wild Child! No Faight!" and a muddy handprint as a signature.

He also discovers the spy from Messias and will have to decide what to do with them.

Also, again without actually acting he's gonna lag behind in skills pretty soon.

The Wild Child, Prince of the Animals
Ruler of the Dark Woods.

The Wild Child tries to make friends with King Jayden by sending him food. He tells Emperor Shibi Js that he's not willing to fight. With all this talk of war he decides to reinforce his woods with some traps, at which he succeeds.

Then he catches a spy from Messias. He will have to decide what to do with this next turn.